A new story of ease

[POD] #20: A new story of ease.

As we move into the portion of this Challenge where we start getting seriously activated and into transition mode, write about this:

1. What about your future have you been telling a story of dread, difficulty or doubt about? What is that story? Who have you been telling it to?
2. Would you like to tell a new story about this element of your future, or are you getting something major out of telling the old, hard story?
3. If you would like to tell a new story of ease about this element of your future, go for it. What’s the new story of ease? Don’t get too carried away here, but examine an alternate way of telling the story that might actually be just as true.
4. Perhaps most importantly, what might it take for you to set yourself up for the new story of ease to be true? Examples:
   
   1. Would it help for you to see yourself differently? To adopt a slightly new identity? Are there qualities about yourself you might need to acknowledge or cultivate? Would it help for you to declare your love for yourself?
   2. Are there skills, tools or resources that would be helpful?
   3. Are there relationships or support that would help? Are there specific people you already know or need to meet who might be the guides or mentors that make the difference between your story of struggle and your story of ease?

I don’t think much about the future.  For as long as I can remember, I have always thought that I would die when I was forty-two years old.  I have several people who have decided that they will celebrate my forty-third birthday with me.  Since that is two years, I suppose a little bit of time will tell.  I have never shared that story with dread, difficulty or doubt, more matter-of-factly.  I have shared the story with several people, my husband, children, family, friends and co-workers.  I have never seen my future and I have no idea where the forty-two years old came from.

I suppose I tell a story of my husband wanting to move to Puerto Rico.  He is on a ten-year plan.  I thought the hurricane, no electricity and lack of usable water might deter that conversation, but he remains constant in this desire.  Prior to the hurricane, we had discussed getting a vacation home there to tide him over.  Part of me believed that it is the idea of a vacation that made him fall in love with Puerto Rico.  Since we are leaving in seven weeks for New Orleans and then a seven-day cruise, we will put that theory of my mine to the test.

I would love to retire at the ripe age of forty-five to live a life of ease on the beach.  He can do his work from most anywhere, so I told him I could move and not work.   I have told him I have to learn Spanish to be able to work, so he bought me Rosetta Stone.   I can pass the tests, but using it in conversation is much harder.   Listening to those native in Spanish is still almost impossible for me.  I pick up on a few words, only enough to be dangerous.  How could I possibly do therapy with an individual, family or group?

The other issue with working in another community is that to do the work I love requires resources.  I not only live in a community with resources, I am well versed in them from years of living here. That knowledge goes away in a new community.  Puerto Rico has a failing economy, resources are not as abundant there.   I can take the time to learn them, but there are likely huge gaps in services that leave people in need, still in need despite best efforts.

The other factor of moving to Puerto Rico is family.  I have four siblings, three children, two in-laws, and four grandchildren.  I have thirteen nieces and nephews and nine great nieces and nephews and that is just my maternal side of the family.  Family is super important to me, so the idea of moving where there is a minimum of a seven hour flight one way and a $700 price tag for just one person to travel round trip, doesn’t make this mom, Mimi, auntie, sister super excited.  I already feel like I don’t have enough time with them and we try to meet monthly for a big family get together and weekly for my children and grands that live local.

If my family all moved with me, I could easily make the transition.  If we have a vacation home and I learn the language, the land and resources, it would make the potential for work more possible.  If I could just not work and lay on the beach, with the sound of the waves to read and write I might be convinced as long as I have internet service to Skype with my family and four to five visits back to the states a year.

The future is unknown.  I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about it.  If I think a year out that takes a lot of effort.

This post is prompted by Tara-Nicholle Nelson’s 30 Day Writing Challenge for Conscious Leaders.