The Argument Waging Within

When it comes to stepping out, I admit I have had quiet a few arguments with God. I used to love to be the center of attention, not so much since I reached adulthood. I like to be used by God to pray bold prayers in my prayer closet. I don’t even mind praying one to one with someone about a need. If I feel that nudge, I will pray in the moment. After many arguments, He has even grown me to be okay to pray out loud corporately. More recent arguments have come when there is an assigned topic or general topic of many prayers, in the corporate prayer and my spirit is somewhere else. He has to get me past my thoughts that there is disunity if I am not on the same page. Usually obedience here shows me that others were on the same page, likely struggling with the same battle.

We have had other arguments about stepping out. I really hate that I like to argue; I am glad that God is better at it than me. I honestly don’t even know why I try; I generally lose. When I don’t lose, the icky feeling I have inside makes the win not worth it all.

Arguments always have at least two sides. When it comes to stepping out those sides are obedience and my flesh. Yes,sometimes there are other factors, insecurities, fear, that play into the argument. These factors can make the flesh’s argument seem like the only answer. Hindsight is rarely available in the heat of that argument.

As I was writing about arguing with God on stepping out, I had this little thought pop into my head. “Why don’t you argue with your flesh about why you should step out?” Ouch!!!! I can honestly say, I don’t think I have argued against myself for stepping out, ever.

It is interesting that while I will spend a lot of time arguing with God about why I shouldn’t do something, I rarely spend anytime focusing on why I should step out. Even knowing that every time I have stepped out in obedience, regardless of the results, the peace and joy that followed never left me regretting it.

Maybe that needs to be my next concerted effort, to turn the argument waging within me towards my flesh before I turn it towards God. If I can argue just as hard against my flesh as I do against God, maybe stepping out will become my first response to God’s calling. I can start the battle with a scripture I quoted to my children every time they said “I can’t”. Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

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This post is part of a 28 days series on Stepping Out inspired by the #Write28Days Blogging Challenge by Anita Ojeda.

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