It takes discipline to not understand, but do something anyway. We live in a world where we strive to understanding things that don’t make sense. We see information as power, and seek to understand everything from large to small details of this world.
Yet, God’s ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:9), and we cannot with our human minds understand everything. We are called to discipline ourselves to step where God directs, even when we don’t understand.
This is the journey that God has had me on for the past seventeen months, to take steps as He directs, and not truly understand where I am going. I am a person who can tolerate change, but still likes control. For example, I love policy and I have no problem with change. However I need to know why the policy is changing. Policy provides for control, and I don’t fight the change if I can understand the reasoning behind it – even if I don’t agree with the change. So to be obedient in this process has taken great discipline.
There are times, I plead with God to show me just one step ahead. I am content where I am. I can honestly say if nothing changed in my life from where I am right now, I would be okay. I have a great God, a great spouse, children, grandchildren, home, career, and just life in general. However, I know there is more that God wants for me; I have not arrived. This drives that need for control in me absolutely crazy some days.
Then I come across scriptures like this one that basically says be obedient to where God is leading you. Stop trying to understand in the process. I know that the scriptures say that obedience is better than sacrifice (I Samuel 15:22). My obedience to His orders are everything, my sacrifice of control is nothing.
The funny thing about my struggle, is that I can look back on my life and there is nothing that God hasn’t used for a purpose. Good or bad, He has worked all things out. Bad things may have happened, a lot, but He has used them all for a greater purpose. So why is it that I feel the need to understand things along the way? I must discipline myself to just be obedient and let Him reveal the purpose of the path when the time is right.