“Do not banish me from your presence; do not take your holy spirit away from me. Give me again the joy that comes from your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.” Psalm 51:11-12
This is one of my favorite Psalm passages. David wrote it after he committed adultery and subsequently murdered the husband of the woman he slept with. The rawness of David’s repentant heart, strikes a chord with my heart.
I have felt the heartfelt concern of being left behind by Him because of my sin. Concerned that I would be stuck in my sin forever, doomed to eternally be separated from Him.
I have felt the need to plead for His presence. Contending for more. Getting small glimpses of His glory. Only to be left wanting more.
The problem with my pleading is that David lived under the Old Covenant. I live under the New Covenant. Holy Spirit does not just come upon me, He resides within me. Joy is a fruit of the Sprit that grows within me and strengthens me. My Salvation is complete in Jesus Christ.
I do still struggle with the “make me willing to obey you.” There are times I feel the prompting of Holy Spirit and still struggle to obey. I want to be willing I want to obey. My Spirit is willing out my flesh is weak.
David felt the weight of his sins. He knew that although his actions involved others, His sin ultimately was against God. He gave into His flesh, but knew the only way to come back from that was through God.
Jesus also knew what it was like to face temptation. In His human weakness, He cried out to God. He knew His Spirit was willing, and His flesh was weak. Instead of giving in to the flesh, He drew on God. We have that same ability.
Prayer – Lord, you know I struggle with my flesh. I want more of Your presence. I want to abide in You. I want to fully obey You. More often though, I want to satisfy my flesh. I am weak. Lord You are strong, and it is in Your joy I find strength. Your Spirit lives in me, the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead, but even more importantly when it comes to dealing with my flesh, it is the same Spirit that saw him to submitting to death on the cross. Lord, because He died for me, Your Spirit lives in me to help me live for You. Help me to be willing to obey because I know You are always with me. I ask this in my Savior’s Holy name, and by the power of Your Spirit I claim it for my life right now.
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