Everything and Nothing Less

Everything and nothing less
My life is Yours
Completely Yours

Singing this song last night in worship, I realized that I was just singing words. It is not just the good that God wants us to give to Him.  He wants everything and nothing less.  When I hold back the dark and ugly feelings I have, I am not doing that.   I was standing there with an anger growing in my heart.  I have no problem offering God my worship, my service, but what do I do with the darkness?

Standing there singing the words from the screen, anger was coming that I didn’t even realize I had.  It was rising up about a situation that is happening in my extended family.  It’s not my story to share here, but it is a tragedy and my heart breaks for everyone involved and those who are impacted.  People who are a part of my daughter’s life, her family, her world.

I had to admit “God, I am angry. I am angry at this whole situation. I was angry at the people who are passing judgement.  People making comments without regard for the people who are really going though the situation.” No sooner had that come out, that I realized I wasn’t just angry, I was angry at Him.

Immediately I felt a sense of condemnation that I would dare be angry at God.  In His house.  While I was supposed to be worshiping Him.  I started to feel condemnation for  judging others for judging. Who am I to question the situation, the bigger picture?

But God said “Give me everything.”

“I’m singing these words God,”  I pray.  “I want to mean it.”

God said again “Give me everything.”

The situation – as bad as it is, God can use it.  Those people who are hateful – God can change their hearts, I can’t.  Even my own anger – God can take it and use it for His glory.

So I stopped.  As tears ran down my face, I gave my anger to God.  He already knew what I was feeling.  I had to trust the ugliness of my life to Him.  I released it to Him.

It is all in His hands and under His control.

Now there’s nothing but peace, nothing but peace.

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About Jackie S

I have been through a lot in life, but through Christ I am more than an overcomer. I am not perfect, I will never claim to be. Praise God I am forgiven though. I am rather opinionated. I see most things in black and white and believe honesty is always the best policy. This combination sometimes comes off harsh. The truth is I love people. I truly love helping others and try the believe the best about others. It is easy to find faults, but focusing on strengths is more my style, but I also shoot it straight. If it sounds harsh, know my heart is for something better for you
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2 Responses to Everything and Nothing Less

  1. It’s hard when you like you have to be cheerful and happy and thankful all the time. But He is truly the One we can tell ALL to! Prayers for your family!

    Like

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