What I am Called to Change

There are many things I see in my line of work that make most people cringe and believe the worst about our society. To me, I try to find the good in people and help people to find the good in themselves and to work through problems that they may be facing.

I have found that I can work with most anyone, although I prefer to work with people who can admit what they are doing is wrong and want the help. I know sometimes that they don’t start out that way, but until they get to the point that “under no circumstance are they willing to change” – I feel like I can help them. I feel sorry for those people who have help but will not utilize it to overcome the struggles thy are facing.

There is one thing that makes my blood boil. Honestly seeing things from this side of the fence I realize it a lot more than I did when I was part of “the system.” TD Jakes once said “What upsets you the most, is what you are called to change.” Well, he said that at a time in my work career that I was struggling with the injustice in the system.

I have always thought the system is broken. I was able to work within it to bring about change, with a hope of one day fixing the whole system. I am now starting to see that I must fix things from outside in if it is ever to truly help people.

At the time I heard T.D. Jakes say that, I was so upset I could only see red. I watched as the system allowed a non-repentant child molester walk away on a technicality after four years of holding a family hostage awaiting a trial. I had spent the two weeks before with the children and family, ignoring my own, because they were terrified of this man. I tried to explain how the system had failed.

My anger at the time, was not towards the system – for it, I made excuses. My anger was towards this man, I didn’t even know, for the scars he left in this child’s life and the fear this family had of him. I spent many a day on my knees in prayer wondering “How could God let this happen?” and asking God to forgive me for the angry, vindictive thoughts I was having towards this man.

As time passed and with much prayer on my behalf and by me, I was able to let go of my anger towards this man, who I still had never met. I was able to go on with my life, although I am not sure the family has been able to truly go on living theirs as they should be able to do.

Fast forward a year, and again I am faced with the same situation. Only this time, there is a face to the name and I can’t blame the non-repentant molester because it was a court ruling, not a technicality that is going to allow him to go free. The “system” made a conscious decision to offer a callback on a nine year sentence, despite evidence, despite the availability of testimony, they made the decision. It wasn’t some guy who got lucky or outsmarted the system, the system failed. It failed these children, it failed this family, and it failed all future victims.

The person who robbed these two children, and possibly two other children gets a slap on the wrist of county jail, 120 day in prison and a five year probation. Guess what there were five years between the allegations of the first child and the next two. Now he will have to wait five more for his next.

I am sorry, but there is no call for that. There is nothing that could have been said or done by this “predator” as he was called by the pre-sentence investigation report in the one hundred and twenty day “SHOCK INCARCERATION” to warrant a release with probation. The only thing SHOCKING about this INCARCERATION was that is wasn’t the nine years that was promised to the family.

I want to yell and scream from the roof tops to make someone take notice. However, I know in small town politics that will only cause a grudge that will be taken out on anyone that I come into contact with. Instead, I must once again separate myself farther away from the system so that I can fight for the people that most need the help. The silent voices of the children who are effected by these shocking judgements, where families and victims are promised one thing, and then something completely different is carried out.

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