Grieve the Holy Spirit

What actions do you think of when You consider grieving the Holy Spirit?

Ephesians 4:30 says do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

This scripture is sandwiched between don’t sin in your anger, use your hands for good, share don’t still, don’t speak unwholesome words, edify and give grace to those who hear your words. It is then followed by let bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, and malice be put away from you. Be kind and forgiving. As I read it, I reviewed several versions for a deeper picture of what God was speaking to my heart through His Word.

So this I say, and affirm together with the Lord, that you walk no longer just as the Gentiles also walk, in the futility of their mind, being darkened in their understanding, excluded from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the hardness of their heart; and they, having become callous, have given themselves over to sensuality for the practice of every kind of impurity with greediness. But you did not learn Christ in this way, if indeed you have heard Him and have been taught in Him, just as truth is in Jesus, that, in reference to your former manner of life, you lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, ²⁴ and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.

Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity. He who steals must steal no longer; but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands what is good, so that he will have something to share with one who has need. Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:17-32

As I read this word, I wanted a deeper understand of what Paul meant by them. It is easy to read through the Scripture and apply my own definition but I felt like I was to go deeper than my own understanding.

Grieve – Lexicon :: Strong’s G3076 – lypeō – to make sorrowful; to affect with sadness, cause grief; to throw into sorrow; in a wider sense, to grieve, offend

Bitterness – Lexicon :: Strong’s G4088 – pikria – bitter hatred

Wrath – Lexicon :: Strong’s G2372 – thymos – passion, angry heat, anger forthwith boiling up and soon subsiding again; denotes indignation which has arisen gradually and become more settled;

Anger – Lexicon :: Strong’s G3709 – orgē -the natural disposition, temper, character; movement or agitation of soul, impulse, desire, any violent emotion

Clamor – Lexicon :: Strong’s G2906 – kraugē – a crying, outcry, a loud and confused noise, wailing of those in distress, especially that of people shouting vehemently, to become loudly insistent

Slander – Lexicon :: Strong’s G988 – blasphēmia detraction, speech injurious to another’s good name:

Malice – Lexicon :: Strong’s G2549 – kakia ill-will, desire to injure

I won’t write it out here, but it is worth reading this passage in a few translations: The Message, The Amplified,The Passion as it just gives a deeper picture of God’s message.

I know I have likely grieved Holy Spirit with my words and actions despite being sealed by Him. I spent much of my early walk bitter, angry, full of wrath, clamouring, full of malice and maybe even a little slandering when I was younger. I am not proud of it, but I have repented and know that God is still working in my life.

God calls us to walk and live differently as His children. Those who are far from HIm think and act differently. We have been given Holy Spirit, renewed in our spirit, are new creations in Christ and have Holy Spirit to empower to empower us. God also calls us to edify other believers.

Edify – Lexicon :: Strong’s G3619 – oikodomē (the act of) building, building up, the act of one who promotes another’s growth in Christian wisdom, piety, holiness, happiness

Most of these words, may start in our heart, but they come out our mouth. OUr mouth is a powerful tool. Our mouth can be used for God when we edify but bitterness, anger, slander, malice and clamor come out our mouth and are tools of the enemy. The Bible has much to say about our tongue.

”A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city, And contentions are like the bars of a citadel. With the fruit of a man’s mouth his stomach will be satisfied; He will be satisfied with the product of his lips. Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.“. ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭18‬:‭19‬-‭21‬ ‭‬‬

”But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place. For we are a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing; to the one an aroma from death to death, to the other an aroma from life to life. And who is adequate for these things? For we are not like many, peddling the word of God, but as from sincerity, but as from God, we speak in Christ in the sight of God.“ ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭2‬:‭14‬-‭17‬ ‭‬‬

”For we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body as well. Now if we put the bits into the horses’ mouths so that they will obey us, we direct their entire body as well. Look at the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are still directed by a very small rudder wherever the inclination of the pilot desires. So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell. For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race. But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way. Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water? Can a fig tree, my brethren, produce olives, or a vine produce figs? Nor can salt water produce fresh. Who among you is wise and understanding? Let him show by his good behavior his deeds in the gentleness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth. This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but is earthly, natural, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy. And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.“
‭‭James‬ ‭3‬:‭2‬-‭18

‬‭”The one who guards his mouth preserves his life; The one who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.“ ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭13‬:‭3‬ ‭‬‬

”This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success.“ Joshua‬ ‭1‬:‭8‬ ‭‬‬

”This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls. But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was. But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does. If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man’s religion is worthless. Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.“ James‬ ‭1‬:‭19‬-‭27‬ ‭‬‬

”“Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or make the tree bad and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit. You brood of vipers, how can you, being evil, speak what is good? For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. The good man brings out of his good treasure what is good; and the evil man brings out of his evil treasure what is evil. But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”“ ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭12‬:‭33‬-‭37‬ ‭‬‬

I have known the power of the tongue and the importance of not allowing the enemy a foothold in my life. but reading these scriptures and meditating on them. I felt this question rise up in my spirit. Is it possible that the things we just sweep away as no big deal are really things that cause God’s Spirit offense?

We have a list of sins that we immediately think would grieve the Holy Spirit. But this Scripture about grieving the Holy Spirit is surrounded by what comes out of our mouth.

Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:29-32

We often minimize the things that we speak. “I was just joking.” “I was being sarcastic.” “I didn’t mean it.” We excuse the words and actions of anger. “I had a good reason.” “They hurt me.” “It is just an effect of my past.” “I couldn’t help it.” But these are the things that surround Paul’s warning to Ephesus that could grieve Holy Spirit.

So how do we move forward?

Remember that Holy Spirit resides inside of you, and you are sealed, if you are follower of Christ. ”Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.“ ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭6‬:‭19‬-‭20‬ ‭‬‬

Imitate God ”Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.“ ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5‬:‭1‬-‭2‬

Walk in Light ”for you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk as children of Light (for the fruit of the Light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth), trying to learn what is pleasing to the Lord.“ ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5‬:‭8‬-‭10‬ ‭‬‬

Walk in wisdom ”Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father;“ ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5‬:‭15‬-‭20‬

Walk in submission ”and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.“ ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5‬:‭21‬ ‭‬‬

• To God
• To your spouse
• To your parents
• To your employer

Put on the armor of God ”Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints,“ ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭6‬:‭10‬-‭18‬ ‭‬‬

We have the ability to chose as followers of Christ. We are empowered by Holy Spirit, so we don’t have to grieve Him by the things we say and our actions. Another sister also added “we can grieve the Spirit by what we take in from others about us”. We don’t need to personally receive the actions of others that would grieve God. We can walk as children of the Light because He lives with us. We can set healthy boundaries around what we allow others to pour into our life also.